A quick note from me: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission if you choose to make a purchase, at no extra cost to you. I only share products I genuinely use, love, or believe can support your healing journey. Thank you for supporting my work and helping me create free, heartfelt resources for women like us.
Living through emotional abuse can feel like being trapped in a fog, where your thoughts are not your own, your nervous system is always on high alert, and even the simplest moments of peace seem out of reach. The emotional echoes don’t always end when the relationship does. Often, they linger, making managing anxiety and depression feel like a daily uphill climb. The weight can be exhausting, and healing may feel overwhelming or even impossible at times.
But you’re not alone. And you’re not broken. You’re navigating midlife emotional recovery, and that’s no small thing. Healing after a toxic relationship takes time, care, and a deep reclaiming of self-worth.
The Hidden Impact of Emotional Abuse
Emotional abuse chips away at our sense of self. It erodes confidence, breeds self-doubt, and makes us question our reality. Over time, this emotional trauma settles into the body and mind. Anxiety might show up as racing thoughts, hypervigilance, or a constant sense of dread. Depression might take hold through emotional numbness, fatigue, or that heavy, hollow feeling that nothing will ever change.
These responses are not flaws. They’re survival strategies, your body’s way of coping with prolonged emotional stress.
Coping Strategies for Managing Anxiety and Depression
When you’re feeling consumed by anxiety or weighed down by depression, even the idea of “coping” can feel like too much. That’s okay. Start small. These are some helpful starting points:
1. Create a Grounding Ritual
Sometimes grounding looks like curling up with a soft blanket and noticing its texture against your skin. Other times, naming five things you can see in the room, or simply watching the way light dances on the wall. These small moments, though they may seem insignificant, can offer a quiet way to reconnect with the present.
2. Set Micro-Goals
Big tasks can feel paralyzing when you’re overwhelmed. Instead, focus on micro-goals like listening to affirmations, enjoying a warm cup of tea, or journaling for just five minutes. These may seem small, but they’re meaningful steps. Celebrate them. They matter.
3. Track Your Triggers with Compassion
Notice what situations, words, or environments heighten your anxiety or deepen your sadness. Keep a gentle log not to judge yourself, but to understand your patterns. This builds self-awareness and offers clues for healing.
4. Seek Safe Support
Healing doesn’t happen in isolation. Whether it’s a trauma-informed therapist, a trusted friend, or a support group for survivors, allow yourself to be seen and heard. You deserve relationships that nurture, not drain you.
5. Be Mindful of Inner Dialogue
Abuse often leaves behind a critical inner voice. When you catch yourself thinking “I’m too sensitive” or “It’s my fault,” pause and ask, “Whose voice is this?” Then speak to yourself the way you would comfort a beloved friend.
“Trauma is not what happens to us, but what we hold inside in the absence of an empathetic witness.”
Creating Your Healing Toolbox
You don’t have to navigate managing anxiety and depression alone. These are some resources that can offer guidance and support:
Books:
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Healing from Hidden Abuse by Shannon Thomas
Radical Compassion by Tara Brach
Free Kindle Books:
Self-Empowerment for Women: Supercharged Self-Worth Secrets & Insider Mind Hacks to Crush Depression & Anxiety by Angela Grace
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: Managing Anxiety and Depression by Dotty Lynn
Podcasts:
Therapy Chat with Laura Reagan
Unf*ck Your Brain by Kara Loewentheil
Apps:
Insight Timer (for guided meditations)
Moodpath (for tracking mental health)
MindShift CBT (for anxiety support)
Many of these titles are available through Kindle Unlimited or Audible Membership and are gentle, accessible ways to explore healing resources at your own pace.
CBD Sleep Gummies
Another tool I’ve added to my healing journey is CBD for Life’s Sleep Gummies. After years of struggling with anxious thoughts that made falling asleep feel impossible, I started using these as part of my wind-down ritual. They’re infused with CBD, melatonin, and calming botanicals, and I’ve found they help quiet my mind so I can actually rest. For me, sleep has been one of the most overlooked but essential pieces of emotional recovery.
You Are Already Healing
If you’re reading this, it means you’ve already taken a step toward healing by managing your anxiety and depression, which is something to be proud of. The road may feel long, but healing is not a destination. It’s a thousand small acts of reclaiming your truth, your voice, and your peace.
You don’t have to have it all figured out. You only need to keep showing up for yourself, one breath at a time.
For more grounding ideas, you might enjoy 5 Grounding Rituals: Heal, Calm, and Feel Strong, where I share gentle practices to help you reconnect with your body and find inner peace after emotional trauma.
I’d love to hear from you. What small practices help you feel safe or supported? Share in the comments and grab the Self Compassion Starter Kit to help you reconnect, reflect, and heal.
Disclaimer: The information in this blog post, Managing Anxiety and Depression After Abuse: Unlock Healing Now, is intended solely for informational purposes and should not be considered a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or therapeutic advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Healing from abuse is a complex and individualized process, and while physical fitness and nutrition may aid in overall well-being, they do not replace the need for professional care.
Individuals experiencing significant symptoms of anxiety, depression, trauma, or other mental health conditions are strongly advised to consult a qualified healthcare provider or licensed mental health professional. Under no circumstances should professional medical advice be disregarded or delayed because of information obtained from this blog post.
The author and the website expressly disclaim any liability for any adverse effects or consequences resulting from using or relying on any information presented herein. Readers are reminded that individual circumstances vary, and seeking personalized guidance from appropriate professionals is essential.
Brach, T. (2019). Radical compassion: Learning to love yourself and your world with the practice of RAIN. Viking.
Levine, P. A. (1997). Waking the tiger: Healing trauma. North Atlantic Books.
National Institute of Mental Health. (n.d.). Depression. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/depression
National Institute of Mental Health. (n.d.). Anxiety disorders. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/anxiety-disorders
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. (2014). SAMHSA’s concept of trauma and guidance for a trauma-informed approach (HHS Publication No. SMA14-4884). https://ncsacw.samhsa.gov/userfiles/files/SAMHSA_Trauma.pdf
Thomas, S. (2016). Healing from hidden abuse: A journey through the stages of recovery from psychological abuse. Morgan James Publishing.
Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Penguin Books.
A quick note from me: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission if you choose to make a purchase, at no extra cost to you. I only share products I genuinely use, love, or believe can support your healing journey. Thank you for supporting my work and helping me create free, heartfelt resources for women like us.
Wow! Amazing quote about trauma. Witnessing is such a powerful action. Inside for yourself and outside for others.
Thank you! I completely agree; witnessing can be a powerful part of healing, both for ourselves and others.
This information is all so important. Thank you for selflessly sharing your thoughts and advice.
Thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot to know that what I share can support and encourage others.
I love grounding excercises as well. It’s a long road to heal, but like you said: small steps. I also love the idea of reclaiming your truth and your voice💚
I’m so glad this resonated with you! Thank you for reading and taking the time to share your thoughts.
This spoke to me so much, as a woman who’s encountered past emotional and physical abuse. I feel like I’m ruined now. It’s been really hard. So, thank you for this post and your blog Angela, really! It’s been a big help for me.
A big way I healed from emotional abuse was to be very strict about who I allow into my life. I needed cheerleaders, besties, and people who love and support me no matter what I am doing (even if they disagree with me). Those loving people helped me lessen the inner voice of my abuser and even though I still hear him sometimes, I have so many other people in my head telling me they love me and support me.
Thank you for sharing this. Surrounding yourself with people who genuinely love and support you can make such a difference in the healing process. It’s so powerful to have those voices of encouragement outweigh the ones from the past.
Thanks for all the book recommendations. And just thanks for making me feel seen in general with this post 🙏
You’re so welcome! I’m truly glad the post and recommendations could make you feel seen and supported; that means so much to me.